Nikki pulls her pink bathrobe aside to almost expose a breast. A cheeky expression on her face.

An Honest Question About Exhibitionism

Are naturists exhibitionist?  

I wonder if the people on the outside imagine that about our culture? That we’re a bunch of people who love to flaunt it. That we’re so proud of our bodies that we want to be nude all the time, to show them off. That we’re all a bit kinky.  

I wonder if that’s why so many people who are opposed to trying the lifestyle say they’d need to lose 15 pounds first. As if that would make them proud enough to be nude socially.  

Then there’s the other way of thinking: that we’re probably all a bunch of slobs who gave up on caring for our bodies, and therefore social norms, so we banded together nude as a middle finger to the establishment. 

As a person who’s met a lot of people within the naturist community, I’d say both are true. There’s a good mix of exhibitionists and F U people and plenty in between. There’s no right or wrong way to be a naturist… is my Canadian, politically correct answer. My heart says that the truer naturist, or the naturist who “gets it” leans away from exhibitionism. It is a fun place to start though! 

When I first got into naturism in my early twenties, it was fun to be nude in unexpected moments. I recall when we went on a bus from Bare Oaks down to Toronto Island, it felt fun to turn myself to the window to show I was nude. And I’ve been top-free with a naturist group for a movie opening. It was a safe, “everyone’s doing it” thing. It was fun, but I find the moment has passed. Nowadays, as you may have read in previous blogs, I prefer if those around me don’t mention my body at all. I’m just going about my business when I’m visiting a naturist venue, not trying to attract attention. Like, really trying not to attract any attention. It’s just my body. It’s a marvelous instrument that carries me through life. I don’t feel titillated by showing my nakedness off. I also don’t mind if someone happens to see me nude. I put a little care into staying away from the windows, etc. when I’m at home, but it isn’t thrilling.  

Maybe it’s just a personality thing, to be an exhibitionist, or maybe it’s maturity. It makes sense that at first blush, naturism is thrilling. You’re breaking the rules of society! Naked in front of others and it’s not for a sexual purpose, or at the doctor’s, or in a changeroom. So different from your everyday so far, hurrah! And maybe on those first few instances you see and compare and giggle and feel so many things. And then, it fades for most of us, and it becomes the comfortable way to be.  

A friend recently suggested that people who attend an actual park regularly likely become desensitized to being nude around others and seeing nude people. He’s an exhibitionist himself and has only ever been to beaches on occasion.  

I can see this in my yoga and meditation students. Whenever I work with people that are comfortable naturists, I have no concern that our session will be derailed with sexuality. They understand that I’m offering a yoga class and that’s all it is. Sometimes I’m joined by folks who are game for a thrill and seem confused about why I’m just teaching a yoga class (or meditation).  

This is a reply to my Unexpected Ask blog. He intended it to be just a reply, but if Taylor Swift is allowed to use her life events to create songs, I can take ridiculous replies and insert them into my blog.  

“Honestly, as someone who has attended your virtual yoga session, I will be dishonest if I said I didn’t wish you exposed your vulva in certain poses. I registered for the nude yoga, and when the class began I couldnt but notice how nice your boobs were. Thus, I wished I saw a glimpse, but I totally respect your comfort zone. 

In hindsight, I think its good that you choose to conceal that part than expose. The combination of that your boobs can be too much for tyro naturists, lol.” 

The bright side of this is that I learned a new word. Tyro means beginner or novice. Heavy into feminist reading I was when this reply found my eyes. Hot anger at the audacity and stupidness of this reply. I can’t imagine a woman ever saying something like it. Imagine a woman taking a martial art class and commenting that she just couldn’t help noticing the instructor’s abs and wished he’d show his dick more often, but wait, maybe it’s better for us ladies that the whole body isn’t exposed lest we self-implode with desire. 

Also, he says he wishes that I’d show my vulva in poses but then acts like a nice guy with the “I totally respect your comfort zone”. Do you? I think if you really had some respect then you’d not bring it up. It’s not like I keep it hidden by accident, like it never occurred to me. I wonder if you’re hoping that I’m a malleable people pleaser, or hungry for money, worried I’ll lose customers? That I’d read your words and think, damn I’m disappointing my viewers by just offering a kick ass yoga class, I guess I should be a piece of sexy meat while I do it too. 

The annoying thing is that I like the idea of all body parts having the same value. That a vulva or a penis aren’t things to hide. That they’re just body parts like our elbows and necks. That I could just go about my yoga teaching and not think about where the camera is, but instead I’m forever mindful to not give a “money shot”. There’s not enough awareness about naturism in the mainstream world. Nudity is equated with sex for most people and I’m doing my best to deliver a pure and wholesome naturist experience. There’s plenty of people who’ve shot yoga videos in which a camera goes slow motion over her curves, and she isn’t really teaching a class. It’s so sad that they’d take such a beautiful spiritual practice and twist into something to wank to. So, I don’t care that some people are disappointed that my classes are just yoga. I can tell when someone has expectations, that it’ll turn sexy, I see them waiting for it, it’s hilarious because I know that moment is never coming. Sorry, not sorry. 

I’m just a girl, doing my job, respecting myself and creating a safe space for fellow naturists. I don’t tolerate mixing sex with the beautiful practices of yoga or meditation. Sex is great, I’ve said that before. But all things have their time and place.  

I’m interested to hear your thoughts on exhibitionism in naturism. I feel like you’re kind of a funny naturist if you are an exhibitionist. But you’re allowed to have opposing thoughts. I know one person in particular that feels very, ta-da! about his body and he’s been a naturist for decades. It fascinates me that he’s so body focused. I think one of the greatest things about naturism is releasing our focus on the body. I wonder if that statement would be confusing to non-naturists? 

18 thoughts on “An Honest Question About Exhibitionism”

  1. I have been a naturist for many years. I am very comfortable with my body, even as I age. I am 63.
    I have felt awkward when being with others that call themselves naturist, but are actually exhibitionist. We were at a textile resort in another country with stronge values. These people flaunted themselves and expected the staff and other guests to be OK with thier behavior.
    I was embarrassed for the staff and guests. I did not want people to know I was with these people who were so disrespectful.
    When people come into a naturist community they are expected to remove thier clothing. In fact some have been shamed for having clothing on.
    So why is it some feel they can be in a textile community and be naked.
    I do believe thier are true naturist, and there are exhibitionist.

  2. naturism involves non-sexual consensual nudity in designated settings promoting body positivity and freedom, while exhibitionism involves non-consensual public exposure for sexual arousal and is generally illegal and socially frowned upon.
    I would never show my nude self to anyone who I didn’t have consent from its all about respect for others. And that’s what part of Naturism is

    1. “naturism involves non-sexual consensual nudity in designated settings promoting body positivity and freedom. . . ” That may apply to countries where public nudity is illegal I guess you are in the USA?). But it doesn’t apply here in New Zealand. You can legally be naked on any beach here, or out in a natural environment, and you don’t need anyone’s consent.

      However, you are correct about exhibitionism, which involves non-consensual public exposure for sexual gratification. That is most certainly illegal here. It’s known as “flashing”. Any sexual behaviour in a public place where you know you could be seen is illegal – naked or clothed.

  3. Ugh! It’s that icky feeling again, the 100% accurate read of misogyny in plain daylight. Guess what, buddy, we don’t have to get twisted up in decoding your language, we’ve already got you figured out, go ahead and keep on blah blah blah’ing…

    And Nikki!!!!! Bringing the FIRE! I felt the dragon there, in the flesh! Well done!

    I’m not an exhibitionist. I admire some of the photography of people who are capturing the human body authentically, but I usually shy away from that myself. I’m very comfortable with my body in the present moment, but uneasy with photographs of me. It’s a weird dichotomy where I’m open to photos but just don’t care to look at them. I’m also uneasy with why someone else would want them. Recognizing it’s a free world and we’re all different, I usually put it out of my mind.

    Still, nobody has the right to hypersexualize a woman’s body, where she is doing yoga, meditating, having lunch, swimming or any other thing she wants to do. It doesn’t mean the body loses sexuality, but that it’s her choice on when to engage, not another person’s. Someone who objectifies and hypersexualizes a woman’s body is not a naturist at all.

    1. As per usual, I have so much love for your response. “Nobody has the right to hypersexualize a woman’s body” is our collective unlearning I think. Some are further ahead than others.*eyeroll

  4. Thank you Nikki. I’m a naturist because being nude is comfortable. I honestly don’t like wearing cloths. It has nothing to do with sex. I don’t care if others see my naked body. When I’m in a nudist environment I don’t check out what others bodies look like. As far as I’m concerned all bodies are beautiful.

  5. When you said “I like the idea that I could go about my yoga teaching and not think about where the camera is”, I was thinking that for the voyeur it’s like Zen: “You will only get what you want when you no longer care about it.”

  6. Nikki, I must say you really touched on some good points in your opening paragraphs. Nudity is freedom to me, but it’s also rebellion, non-conformity, a bit of daring adventure, and even some exhibitionism. And I don’t think exhibitionism has to have a sexual connotation. In my late teens, what is now called mooning was fun. We called it “hanging a BA”. It could be a humorous prank, a protest, or a dare to be shocking, I fondly remember going to Disneyland around 1965 and being denied admission because my hair was too long. Oh well, they heard from us all right. My three friends and I got in the car and drove by the entrance with three bare behinds hanging out the the windows as I laid on the horn. Dang, as the getaway driver and couldn’t drop trow. So that was a protest with intent to shock. Don’t know it it still exists, but every July 2, hundreds would line about along a fence in Laguna Niguel California and moon a passing AMTRAK train. Remember streaking? Exhibition at its finest. No intent to harm, only good clean fun. Sort of a good way of saying, “I don’t play by the rules.”

    In the sixties, I was definitely in the hippie/flower child culture. At any outdoor gathering, the music would play, people were trippin’, and invariably, some girl would rip her top off and start dancing (others might follow). You know, the ol’ Woodstock vibe. The world naked bike ride is exhibitionism labelled as a protest, and in some ways an outgrowth of that sixties culture. Non-conformity, yeah, that’s it.

    You mentioned personality, well yes, that’s a big part for me. There are those who juts have a “Hey, look at me” air. I have a bit of that, and I don’t need to to be naked to show it. If I go to a business event, I’m likely to be the one in the yellow shoes, orange pants, and purple shirt. Some may roll their eyeballs, some may think it’s cool, but the look get’s noticed. That’s what the red carpet award ceremony is anyway. Those women with dresses showing almost everything end up getting mentions in the media. To be balanced, so does the guy in hot pink sneakers and a tux. I used to go to yearly award dinners where a certain guitarist would show up in a kilt. It’s called “doing your own thing.”

    As for the comments regarding what you should expose in yoga, I find that fellow’s comment totally inappropriate. The club I belong to as well as AANR both have rules of etiquette stating that one should refrain from leering or mentioning someones body or state of dress, I like to break rules, but I would never talk about someone that way as I know it could cause them some discomfort. Even without the rules, I just would never even think of saying something like that. I may enjoy being a bit out of the ordinary, but I’m big on common courtesy on a personal level. The only reason I will look at you during yoga is to see if I am doing something correctly. As you touched on, the years of public nudity has me somewhat desensitized to the whole subject. We’re all just people. As the old saying goes, “You’ve seen one, you’ve seen them all”. With the current state of affairs, I’m not sure how true that is, but you get the idea.

    Dennis/Denny Braunschweiger (my zoom de plume)

  7. I am a nudist, not to look at others or to be seen myself. It is simply how I am most comfortable. Society seems to deem this to be inappropriate, so I am only allowed to be naked in my own home and can’t even enjoy being outside naked. Attending nudist resorts or participating in nudist activities allows me to have that freedom. I enjoy being around fellow nudists because they get it. They don’t feel threatened by my naked body or regard it as anything sexual. Comments like the ones you shared in your blog always leave me shaking my head. It’s no wonder so many people, especially women, would not feel comfortable being a nudist. It’s shocking to me that they even think they are giving you a compliment when they say these things.

  8. Hello Nikki I have been nude before so I have good experience about nude I use go nude bech so that I am interested come to yoga class in nude in Essex plese kown so like to meet people with nude and I am deaf my slef kown thanks 🙏

    Stewie jack

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